Fairness of judgments
By Crusader | April 17, 2008
The American fancy with the hypocrisy and barbarism continues. The world’s view that it is the most humane country has many contradictions.
One that that comes to mind is in the case of death by lethal injections. The obstinate ness and harshness of the US courts are evident from the supreme court judgment.
“We … agree that petitioners have not carried their burden of showing that the risk of pain from maladministration of a concededly humane lethal injection protocol,
and the failure to adopt untried and untested alternatives, constitute cruel and unusual punishment,” Chief Justice John Roberts said in an opinion that garnered only three votes. And further goes on saying “a condemned prisoner cannot successfully challenge a state’s method of execution merely by showing a slightly or marginally safer alternative.” Doesn’t a convict have rights, isn’t this a violation of human rights by the highest court?
Why people of such a progressive country do not raise their voice against such inhuman acts by their own judiciary. Any issues related to the human suffering should be handled with utmost care, though it is in regard to condemned prisoners. Can’t judge order for an inquiry in to a more humane lethal injections. There may be many easy and painless alternatives are available, medicines, which can bring instant death. But who cares, people are interested in the macabre, a 3 stage hi-fi drama.
And this is not the only issue, more such foolish laws can be found for matrimonial disputes. Domestic violence law is heavily biased against men, just by the statement of the wife (though false) a man can be arrested by the police with out investigation. And there are instances where a husband is jailed because he lost the job and failed pay the child’s support. Are these not state sponsored crimes against men. Who are proposing such laws? Are judges going out of the laws and giving such absurd judgments. It is both. Laws are poorly drafted; any one can infer anything like a Nostradomus prophecy. And of course judges use this opportunity to satisfy their ego, bias or to improve their standing in the society (women’s groups who frequently call them as chief guest for their meetings). Any crime is a crime, intentionally wrong/harsh judgment is also crime which needs to be punished.
How many of us think injustice done to a man is also injustice. And those who think, how many can say this in public. How many of those who agree and dare will take out time for this. In fact most people are not bothered about the truth, they just support woman. Every one wants to be a social reformer-a great soul who supports only mothers, sisters and women.
Any right thinking person will not differentiate between a man and a woman for justice, but courts do. Surprising!!! And they also call this justice.
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Men suicide: a wishy-washy temperament
By assr | April 14, 2008
Death visits every living being, however is natural, but no one wants to intentionally risk their life when life is meant for living? Therefore mankind on this earth fights for survival and existence. Suicide is an unnatural death and is nothing but self killing, in Latin suicidium, from sui caedere, means “to kill oneself”. Suicide is by no means a simple issue, for it hinges on a spectrum of ethical, legal, sociological and psychological problems. Suicide is a type of deliberate self-harm and is defined as a human act of self-intentioned and self-inflicted cessation. It ends with fatal outcome. The unsuccessful attempt of self killing is called suicide attempt.
“Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem”. Suicide is the second commonest manner of unnatural death flanked by accident and homicide. Religiously speaking suicide is a dishonorable act. Judaism, Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism etc., all religions condemn suicide. Riligiously spaking person who has committed suicide will receive less honor in receing the riligious formalities. Suicide is off two tyeps, ‘selfish’ suicide, and ‘nonselfish’ suicide. Majority of suicides falls under selfih suicides, i.e. to escape from certain responsibilties or competition, some are due to lack of self cofidance, threat from various sources, poverty, fear of prosecuation etc. People who attempt or complete suicide usually suffer from extreme emotional pain and distress, failed to cope with their problems. They are likely to suffer from mental illness, particularly severe depression, and to feel hopeless about the future.
In the legal perspective, suicide is a crime (Indian Penal Code, 309). People who has committed suicide may not be aware of consequences of these laws, but failed suicide victims are punishable by upto one year impronsonment. According to Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, and psychiatrist- Karl Menninger, all suicides have three interrelated and unconscious dimensions: revenge/hate (a wish to kill), depression/hopelessness (a wish to die), and guilt (a wish to be killed). Clinical psychologist, Edwin Schneidman described suicide as sense of unbearable psychological pain. Mass suicides were known from the history where people committed suicides against government policies or severe communal threat, but individual suicides are mostly considered as helplessness created by the circumstances (society) which could be personal (self) or government policies.
In the Asian subcontinent, past from history, individual suicides are not new since many warriors and great leaders committed suicides just to avoid persecution. Even in ancient Egypt, people considered suicide a humane ‘way to escape intolerable conditions’. In Indian scenario, suicides are higher in upper middle class families and greater in lower middle class families. Among educated, highly educated people show higher suicide tendency [JIAFM, 2004, 26(2)]. In India, the suicide rates are alarmingly increasing, especially among men, and more specifically among married men. According to National Crime Records Bureau, “in every 10 minutes a husband is committing suicide in India due to domestic violence and financial abuse by wife and her family”. Males are four times more likely to die from suicide than are females (world wide strategy). Statistics show that males out numbered females in ‘committing’ suicide. However, females are more likely to ‘attempt’ suicide than are males. Suicide tendency also increase with age. Suicide rates among the elderly are highest for those who are divorced or widowed. According to Emile Durkheim, a modern sociologist, marriage is a protector against suicide. As per the study conducted by psychologist Jason B. Luoma, divorced or widowed women showed low suicide tendency compared to men in that condition. This is due to higher prevalence of depression, a greater use of highly lethal methods and social isolation. In pre-modern India, the bonds of family and community provided succor in times of distress. In modern India, no combined family system exists, and individuals are left alone with failed marriages or family disputes.
Males are more exposed to society than females, for this reason any turbulence in their personal, professional life intern affects their social stature. This could be the reason why there is about 64.6 % men commit suicide in India every year. The married men’s suicide rate is extremely high (46.4%) in India, and at least 21.2% married men suicides are directly due to spousal violence (National Crime Records Bureau). Divorce or marital separation seems to be more than doubled the risk of suicide in men, whereas in women, marital status was unrelated to suicide. Thus suicide is a serious public health problem among men. Think of families of our friends who have committed suicide, their sufferings are doubled and their grief is in multitudes. Who should us blame- person, or circumstance? I agree that circumstances are more powerful than man (man here refers mankind), but man is much stronger than circumstances since man creates circumstance. Winning one’s self is important than losing. We are born to live, hence live life to its fullness.
If you have been thinking about suicide, get help right away. Talk to someone you trust as soon as you can. Suicide has a devastating emotional impact on surviving family members and friends. Parents often suffer exaggerated feelings of shame and guilt. Because of the social stigma, or shame, surrounding suicide, survivors may avoid talking to others about the person who died, and others may avoid the survivors. Helping someone who is suicidal can be very stressful too. Don’t you want to find meaning of your life? Don’t you want to show what you’re to the society? Don’t you want to make a difference? Then fight against self killings, tell distressed how you succeeded. Join hands - let’s fight against self-killings. STOP MEN SUICIDES.
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Differentiated Similarities - Indian Men
By Crusader | April 13, 2008
Assumptions and hidden agendas wherever involved in the foundation and design of any society, can lead to serious problems over the years. Being deemed as the Protector, the Provider and the Adventurer, men themselves made the world believe that they cannot suffer. It is not hard to notice, parents telling their SON, be like a MAN, stop crying like women, and learn to do things your own way. Well in a way that is good, as it teaches the MAN to be self dependent as he has to protect and provide when HE grows up. But the imbibitions of this line of thought are so engraved and deep rooted that the MAN as HE grows up almost starts feeling sorry for feeling BAD, ABUSED, HARASSED, TORTURED. He starts feeling as though he has no RIGHT to do so. But that is not a healthy sign, even psychologists and relationship experts have voiced out their concerns over this behavioral traits of men and have enchanted it umpteen number of times that IT IS OK TO FEEL BAD AND SHARE THE SAME AND ACCEPT THAT SOMETHING IS BOTHERING THEM, but sadly enough it falls on deaf ears for age old stereotypes which are rock engraved take centuries of time and loads of sufferings, realizations and metamorphosis to take a new and desired form. It is not uncommon to see that when a MAN tries to discuss his problems pertaining to a relationship, he is cornered saying either, you are a MAN, stop cribbing like a WOMAN, or she is a WOMAN, it will be like this only. Such responses have led to the establishment of euphoria in the society as well as the legislative and the executive ambiance that Men do not need anything, they have everything. This was also recently upheld in a judgment by the Honorable Delhi High Court hearing a petition challenging the tenacity of the Domestic Violence Act 2005, citing it as Ultra Vireos of Article 14 of the Constitution of India. The petition was dismissed saying the argument held no merit as the court was of the view that, Though men are victims of violence, such incidences are few and far between, thus ruling out the possibility of protection from the parliament. This statement, sadly enough reflects a very bad taste of mind, which though acknowledges the existence of domestic violence against men, but refuses to accept it for the very lack of proper data to substantiate a lesser known claim. If the data provided by the National Crime Records Bureau is anything to go by, the number of suicides committed by men in the year 2005 and 2006, stand at a staggering figure of 150000, as compared to 50000 for women. Does this not reflect the sorry state of affairs, Indian Men are currently in. Out Of these 150000, 108000 have been committed suicide. Which is fairly explainable enough as well, as the government which earns 82 % of taxes from these Men has washed off its hands of this alarming trend, these men have no protection, voice or say. Men are not only victims of Domestic Violence; they are victims of misuse of these laws as well. 99% of these cases of Domestic Violence and Dowry harassment filed against Men and their families are false and filed with a motive to extort money, harass men and his family or as revenge for divorce, when women is not ready to adjust with husband family and unfortunately the Horse Trading goes on in the Temple of Justice and is passed off as WOMEN LIBERATION and EMPOWERMENT OF THE WEAKER SEX. Most Indian women successful in this game of harassment playing victim, as most of the society and judiciary think all women are victims and all men are villains. All Men around the HARASSED HUSBAND try to brainwash and console the man saying the girl needs money, protection etc. What these men fail to understand here is that there has been a serious role reversal of the perpetrator of violence and the victim of violence wherein the victim, being hailed as the criminal, is forced to compensate the tormentor, being hailed as the victim. Also these men feel great they are protecting a woman, which is good enough, for if the MAN is meant to protect, he should protect and feel good about it, but nowhere does it stand justified to protect at the cost of another MAN. But sadly enough this is the trend catching on slowly. It looks highly delirious for a MAN to exist in a society suffering from DOUBLE STANDARDS where one judgment speaks of the inability of the ambit of the Domestic Violence Act 2005 to cover men as victims and other one says that incidences of Domestic Violence being far and few between, men should not expect protection from the parliament. It is not hard to see the repercussions of such DIFFERENTIATED SIMILARITIES amongst men, who are now not even refraining from taking the law into their hands by either committing suicide or murder, what with having exasperated with the apathy meted out by the administrators of their own brethren. Under British made law, which India still governs, there are not much changes or amendments for last 150 years. Unfortunatly even after 50 years of Independent India, No one born so far to amend as per current situation, or draft a new one than copied Indian Penal code of British.
Once again this question is put forward to the civil society and the government that are they ready to accept this trend, wherein cornered men think of snuffing of life as the only final solution or they have the guts and willingness to change the courses of the tides and the winds. I hope some spineless men start developing spines after reading these lines.
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Spineless Men
By Crusader | April 10, 2008
In what has been an age old testament regarding the sensibilities of the genders, we have a preset imageries of the Sterner and the Fairer Sex, leading to the sediment of a quasi – rigid quasi – stubborn mindset which is stereotypically ubiquitous in nature, definition and essence, wherein the Sterner Sex, the Male Gender has been termed the Protector, the Provider and the Adventurer while the Fairer Sex, the Female Gender has been termed the object of Beauty, the Home Maker and the Life Giver. Men feel great providing and feel like God when they protect someone, especially a Woman and in this process often forget that they too are humans who can need someone. They feel a big problem discussing their problems and feel low doing so, forgetting the fact that they too are humans, females, on the other hand, find it quite natural to discuss their problems and also do not feel low doing so. This process combined over years of practice has led to a seemingly true and apparently explained perception that Women need a lot of protection and that protection has to come from a Man, wherein it led to the establishment of the euphoria mirrored in the statement, “Men’s Duties and Women’s Rights” which has been very instrumental in the design of the social norms and the legal design as well and Men have been highly instrumental in designing this euphoria. Over years of turmoil and toil this euphoria caught such an attention that the need or requirement for its conjugate euphoria, mirrored in the statement, “Men’s Rights and Women’s Duties” has either been never been felt or if ever sounded, was over - sounded and over – shadowed by the first one.
So ubiquitously it has been assumed that Men are guilty of crimes and Women, even if criminals are so due to some COMPELLING REASON, this has led to men being cornered over centuries so much so that, they are now viewed with suspicion and biased assumption, not only by Women folks, but by other Men as well. It is not uncommon to see that when a woman is embroiled in some crime, men and women, in general, empathizing with the culprit and struggling to find reasons leading to her metamorphosis to a criminal. On the other hand, the same case being with a Man, not only is he subjected to condemnation, prosecution and punishment shall also follow as package bonuses. That does not mean that he is allowed to commit crimes and should be encouraged to do so. Crime is Crime and is independent of gender. If a Man commits a murder or if a Woman commits a murder, it results in the same after – effect, a life is snuffed and denied existence. Then why do we have different standards set for treatment with the criminal based on gender. The man committing the murder is viewed as a criminal while a woman doing the same is viewed as an object of sympathy.
We do have such standards, for as they say that the society is male – dominated and if it is actually so that the society is male – dominated, then those men are spineless men who have set such standards. A standard suffering from an undue sentimental balance towards a particular gender which associates different assumptions for Men and Women. Very recently we had a landmark judgment from the Honorable High Court of Delhi expanding the ambit of the Domestic Violence Act 2005 to female partners engaged in live – in relationships with their male partners. This article is not meant to condemn the particular judgment, but the saddening fact is an unexplained assumption as cited in the judgment, “the court said that in a case of women having live-in relationships with a man it could be fairly assumed that the relationship was initiated by the man.” The question here that irks the rational mind is that, is starting any relationship solely dependent on only one of the partners or is it that when the relationship is sweet, both the partners cherish the fruit and when it goes awry only the Man is borne to bear the brunt of the fallacy. Did we give considerable weight age to other possibilities that the relationship was started mutually or the Man was forced into the relationship keeping in view the protection laws that exist in case the relation does not work and in that case a monetary relief from the Man to the Woman will be on its way?
Further points of gravitational significance in the judgment are “since an assumption can fairly be drawn that a live-in relationship is invariably initiated and perpetuated by the male” and “the court should also not be impervious to social stigma which always sticks to women and not to the men.” If we are going to have cases to be decided on such biased and preset assumptions then probably we can do away with the legal process and decide the cases arbitrarily because anyways Men are going to suffer from such assumptions wherein they are going to be denied fair and impartial justice and will be continued to be tried under loosely drafted laws prepared with a mindset against the principles of natural justice. Such judgments are just an addition to the growing mistrust amongst men towards the judiciary as has been recently highlighted with gruesome incidents like Amit Budhiraja of Infosys Technologies murdering his wife and subsequently committing suicide, citing marital problems as the reason for the extreme decision and its consequent implementation to reality and the more recent dual suicide by a techie couple in Hyderabad, again marital problems being at the core of the reason for the snuffing away of two young lives. These persons were of loose persona who preferred ending their lives rather than giving a fight against the adversities and showing the moral and courage to stride against the tide, but on a judgmental and analytical benchmark of post – incidental synopsis the height of frustration and apathy towards the government and the society to solve marital problems also comes to the fore decorated with another age – old assumption that, “Which marriage does not have problems?” If that be so and that being true, is it fair and just enough to allow crimes and murders to be the final solutions in such cases?
Amit Budhiraja was working with Infosys Technologies for nine years, elucidating his stable nature, took the extreme decision of killing his wife and committing suicide subsequently when his wife, allegedly, threatened him of a false dowry case, when he had come to know of an alleged affair of hers with a colleague of hers. He was well aware that with a biased society defined and ruled by spineless men, who prefer believing a woman’s tears more than irrefutable evidence, he had few chances to safeguard himself and his parents, once his wife would start crying TORTURE and DOWRY. It would be very hard for him to prove his innocence and an unnecessary legal battle of 5 – 6 years would ensue, stripping him off his finances. Day in and day out we see more and more such cases, where Men are denied a chance to even defend themselves, let alone imparting justice to them. Let us hope the civil society and the government and the judiciary wakes up to this alarming trend of growing distrust amongst suffering men for the cornering they are offered, leading them to turn to extremist and take the law into their hands, and does something to curb the menace. The article does not intend to justify the crimes committed by men, so what it has been fueled by the distrust and apathy, meted out to them, nourished by the system and the society, there has to be severe condemnation of crime, in order to curb it, but the society needs to wake up to this alarming trend and start to think of the conjugate euphoria described above and referred again here, “Men’s Rights and Women’s Duties”. Are those spineless men who believe that the society is male dominated ready to make an effort to institute the conjugate euphoria for suffering Men ?
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Caged men and crazy wives: facts about impotence
By assr | April 2, 2008
During our weekly counseling to harassed husbands we learned that one of the most common complaints from their beloved wives is impotence, which is besides of all other allegations. Wife complaining on men’s sexuality despite of living with him and knowing him for a long time is embarrassing. A man who lived with his wife for 12 years and had a child aged about 10 years is also charged with impotency, of course, this man is now confused of his sexual identity. The word ‘impotence‘ was derived from the Latin term impotentia coeundi describing simple inability of men performing sex with women. Best of my knowledge, no man ever received comments on his sexual ability as long as he remained either a boyfriend or a partner/mate. However once he becomes a husband and a responsible person, he learns new things about his own sexuality. Many does not even know what exactly impotence means, men feel ashamed of being called impotent hence they simply avoid talking about it.
Man’s first instinct is life (to live) and the second instinct is sex, thus sexual personality and its positive reception is important for men in the society. In India though there were yet no proper statistics on male impotency, in developed countries like in America there were 30 million men are reported suffering from impotence. Impotency is of two types, primary impotency and secondary impotency: Primary impotency occurs at early sexual life where as secondary impotency is associated with mental health, a problem that aggravates other physical problems. Surveys say that men who suffer from impotence or being framed of impotence will have lower self-esteem, relationship turmoil, less motivated at work, embarrassment, feeling ashamed and poor self-image.
Hyderabad-based andrologist and impotence expert Dr. Sudhakara Krishnamurti told to Outlook that a decade ago couples would come to him after failing to consummate their marriages for 10-15 years. Today wives often drag their husbands into the clinic within the first week of their marriage. “With women being more demanding in the bedroom, it puts a lot of pressure on normal guys,” he said (As written by Sultan Shahin in Asia Times). Indian civilization is on the move as every one agrees, which includes the urge for sexual exploration. Let’s learn about the factors that are affecting men’s sexuality.
Sexual dysfunction disorders can be broadly classified into,
1) sexual desire disorder (hormonal imbalance),
2) sexual arousal disorder (impotence),
3) orgasm disorder (delay or absence of orgasm), and
4) sexual pain disorder (painful intercourse).
Sexual dysfunction arises due to certain health problems such as diabetes, cardiovascular disease (atherosclerosis, uncontrolled high blood pressure), possible side effect from medications (beta blockers, antihistamines, certain antidepressants, and others), nerve or spinal cord damage, obesity, lack of physical fitness, fatigue, and complications from smoking, substance abuse (marijuana, heroin, cocaine and alcohol). Too much alcohol can cause “shrinkage of testicles,” leading to decreased production of male hormone, testosterone. Some of the men’s common sexual problems are premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction (impotence), libido, retarded ejaculation, and male menopause (andropause).
It is always not true that the impotent men are infertile. Present day sexual problems or otherwise called as impotence causing problems (as per medical records) are focused mainly on two dysfunctional ties,
a) erectile dysfunction, and
b) emotional dysfunction. “Erectile dysfunction” can be diagnosed using techniques such as, ultrasonography, neurological evaluation, cavernosometry, cavernosography etc. suggesting that the problems are associated with bio-physical and bio-chemical mechanisms. Erectile dysfunction though starts only in 5-6% of male population, it grow with age and 25-30% men are victimized by erectly dysfunction by the time they reach the biological age of 65. Erectile dysfunction can be cured with oral medication using drugs like, Viagra, Levitra, Cialis and many more. As mentioned above, fertility problems are not always due to impotency. In majority of men the actual infertility problems are associated with azoospermia, varicocoele, failed testicular functions and hormonal imbalance. Plethora of treatments and methods are available for treatment and to enhance vigor/vitality.
Diagnosis of “Emotional dysfunction” is rather tricky as problems mainly arise due to combination of medical (health issue) and social (substance abuse) or emotional factors. Emotional stress (depression, anxiety, failed relationship, guilt, mental stress or exhaustion) leads to the addiction either to drugs, alcohol or smoking, all of them are known factors for impotency. Emotional factors affecting sex and men’s ability include both interpersonal problems and psychological problems within the individual. Interpersonal problems are mainly marital or relationship problems or lack of trust and open communication between partners. Psychological problems include depression, sexual fears or guilt, or past sexual trauma. However the emotional dysfunction is transient and repairable with either simple counseling or treatment.
Unfortunately the present day married men is always challenged for his manliness (potency) in all aspects if he is childless. Many men these days (even after having children and with proven medical records of virility) are suspected for potency. Many young men due to lack of medical knowledge in physiology and psychology of sex are subjected to severe humiliation by their wives. While infertility may be as much a problem for men as for women, it is still the women who almost invariably raise the subject. In fact many women often confused with impotency and fertility. Since sex is no more an interpersonal subject as it involves society, it deals with life. By looking at the population growth rate no one would dare to comment on potency of an average Indian man. But it is true that Indian men are also suffering from impotency, however the rates are low compared to the other parts of the world. Unlike in rest of the world, impotence in India is psychogenic thus unsatisfied women here are using impotence as a weapon to harass/humiliate their husbands.
Impotence is a ground for divorce (Indian Divorce Act and The Hindu Marriage Act). Similarly denial of sex with spouse is sufficient ground for divorce in India. Recently in Indian courts (as per unpublished data collected from different High Courts) also there is a rise in divorce petitions on the grounds of impotence. Since proving impotency is rather trivial, many further added that their husbands are homo or bi-sexuals. However the guilt and shame of being accused of one of the above said and further considering the society and social status, many men suffer in silence and compromise for their wives deal. The legal meaning of impotence is man’s inability to copulate and inability to propagate.
Most of the cases impotence is curable (85-90%) and many cases it is temporary (associated with psychological disturbances). If a women seeking for divorce on legitimate grounds i.e. husband’s potency, she should be granted divorce. But using fake impotence as one of the grounds to get quick divorce by humiliating men is unbearable and compelling. As stated by many, the main reasons behind such allegations was/is incompatibility, ego clashes between the career-minded husbands and wives. If men know where they stand and realize their standards and sexuality, no wife can batter him and charge with impotence. Even if she does, never be ashamed of with false accusations; try proving yourself as there are some medical standards for the same. Since sex is secondary to life, and marriage is part of life and not just life, stop worrying about false allegations. Don’t hide yourself, don’t feel being locked up in the cage, speak out and seek advice and timely help from appropriate counselor, then you be able to see how small your problem is. After counseling we found that men who were left stunned and bristled with resentment earlier now show a generous dose of emotional courage. Are you joining them?
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Japanese men are doomed
By Crusader | March 28, 2008
Learn to Be Nice to Your Wife, or Pay the Price
Japan’s Salarymen, With Pensions At Stake, Work on Their Marriages
FUKUOKA, Japan — Salarymen — the black-suited corporate warriors who work long hours, spend long evenings drinking with cronies and stumble home late to long-suffering wives — have danger waiting for them as they near retirement.
Divorce. A change in Japanese law this year allows a wife who is filing for divorce to claim as much as half her husband’s company pension. When the new law went into effect in April, divorce filings across Japan spiked 6.1 percent. Many more split-ups are in the pipeline, marriage counselors predict. They say wives — hearts gone cold after decades of marital neglect — are using calculators to ponder pension tables, the new law and the big D.
Skittishly aware of the trouble they’re in, 18 salarymen, many of them nearing retirement, gathered at a restaurant here recently for beer, boiled pork and marital triage.
The evening began with a defiantly defeatist toast. Husbands reminded themselves of what their organization — the improbably named National Chauvinistic Husbands Association — preaches as a sound strategy for arguing with one’s wife.
“I can’t win. I won’t win. I don’t want to win,” they bellowed in unison, before tippling from tall schooners of draft beer.
The pork was scrumptious and the mood jolly, but throughout the dinner meeting there was an undertow of not-too-distant domestic disaster.
“The fact that a wife can now get 50 percent has ignited guys to think about their fragile marriages,” said Shuichi Amano, 55, founder of the association and a magazine publisher in this city of 1.3 million in western Japan. The word chauvinist in the group’s name, Amano says, is not intended to refer to bossy men. Instead, it invokes the original meaning of the Japanese word that today translates as chauvinist, kanpaku, a top assistant to the emperor.
Men near the end of their corporate lives, he said, are especially edgy. “To be divorced is the equivalent of being declared dead — because we can’t take care of ourselves,” Amano said.
When his wife told him eight years ago that she was “99 percent” certain she was going to dump him, Amano said, the only things he then knew how to do in the kitchen were to fry eggs and pour boiled water over noodles.
Since then, in addition to learning how to listen and talk to a wife he had ignored for two decades, Amano said, he has learned how to take out the trash, clean the house and cook.
Marriage in Japan is going through an increasingly rough patch. As in the United States and most wealthy industrialized countries, the age of first marriage is being pushed back in Japan. Between 1962 and 2006, the average age at which a woman married for the first time slid from 24 to 28.
But for well-educated (and presumably well-informed) young women in Japan, marriage is fast becoming a sociological rarity.
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The consequences of filing a FALSE DOWRY CASE
By Crusader | March 27, 2008
The consequences of filing a FALSE DOWRY CASE on the MAN, his friends and families. If for a while we assume that the law is not misused, then also this serves a very lesser purpose as conviction under this law is very difficult, for it needs to be proved the said HARASSMENT for the UNLAWFUL DEMAND was of such nature that it was of danger to the life and limb of the complainant or that it drove the complainant to suicide to the satisfaction of the court beyond reasonable doubt. So we have terms like “satisfaction of the court” and “beyond reasonable doubt” which are highly contentious and interpretation dependent and also difficult to PROVE, DISPROVE or term the accusations and allegations as NOT PROVED.Hence even if the case is true, justice is hard to be delivered. And the case being true, it is the girl here who has been harassed and yet the chances of she getting justice will be very meek. And for a false case, there is no question of imparting justice to the girl as no harassment as alleged has ever taken place and real justice should be meted out to the boy’s family which never happens in a great country like India which assumes that all daughters-in-law are true to the core and all in-laws of complaining and cribbing girls have never uttered a word of truth in their whole life. As has been repeatedly highlighted that filing a false case is gross misuse of IPC 498A and we have also seen even if the case is true, justice is far to be sought.
The retrospective effects of such a case are far reaching and case based. Firstly it is a lifetime blow to the husband, a stab in the back from someone as close to heart as SPOUSE, LIFE PARTNER. Hence the moral and emotional setback is always there. To add to it, the stereotypic and orthodox mindset of the society that a MAN must have done something TERRIBLY BAD to deserve this kind of treatment. This is a result of age long hypnotization and mass brain wash by the feminists to lead into the whole world believing that women are VICTIMS for no fault of theirs and men are PERPETRATORS of violence without rhyme and reason. With such a one – sided ubiquitously stereotypic mentality prevailing world over and especially within and amongst the legislative and executive machinery, it becomes almost next to impossible for the MAN to prove his innocence, in spite of the fact that he possesses evidences to support his claim otherwise. Such an atmosphere can have wide and varied effects. We shall study those under two categories.
Men who have not yet fathered their offspring: -
For these men, the story is relatively simpler since they do not have the emotional kickback of a child. Also the fact that they have been saved from fathering a new born from a devilish woman gives much solace to them which can transform into the much needed courage to ensue the ever – impending fight. But depending on individuality and circumstances, these FALSE CASES can either kill the manhood or give it a push. Moreover men falsely implicated in such cases seem to lose faith in the institution of marriage completely, especially if the marriage is less than a year old before the case is filed. Such euphoria in the society can lead to severe and irrevocable deterioration of the trust and faith on marriage, the institution which has been the foundation of family life since time immemorial. It is not only those men who are themselves directly involved in such cases but also other unmarried men around such men like their younger brothers, first cousins and close friends who watch the MAN go through the abuse, tend to loose the confidence on MARRIAGE, and refrain from tying the knot. They tend to develop a sense of insecurity getting married as they see rendering themselves liable to be made easy scapegoats of this LEGAL TERRORISM. Moreover they don’t really need to get married to be embroiled in the abuse, as any of their brother’s or cousin’s or for that matter any friends’ wife can also drag them into a false case saying these men were hand in gloves with her husband in ‘torturing her for dowry’.
This view holding true for men who resolve to fight the misuse, we will now see the effects of such a false case on the MAN who gives in to the misuse and either accepts the DEMANDS of the girl or settles for money. Such men not only loose their self-esteem and sense of manhood, leading the life of a henpecked husband but also carry the self-remorse and guilt of setting a bad example and contributing to the spread of misuse indirectly. Whereas the blame for such a conduct on part of the MAN cannot be directly attributed to him as has been already iterated that - “in majority of the cases, the metamorphosis of a happily married man to a legal fighter dies prematurely and the matter ends with a monetary compromise” – the reasons for the death of the metamorphosis is another big topic over which volumes of analysis can be represented. For now we look into the effects of the death of the metamorphosis. And such a man who has conceded to the demands, and has not yet fathered an offspring, when actually does so, cannot set an example of a brave MAN and the offspring shall grow up to see a henpecked man and will carry the traits as such. If she is a girl, she will expect her prospective husband also to be such and if he is a boy, he will realize this as a way of life. So we see a wrong trend being set in the society where giving in to the wife’s illogical demands is considered LIBERATION of WOMEN and not doing so results in her HARASSMENT for which we have the law called IPC 498A, and thus a vicious circle is created wherein the misuse self-feeds itself and grows to be a self-nourished monster devouring the demographics and essences of a sane and awake society.
Another ill-effect of such a false case is the wreckage and deterioration of the intellectual property of the country. It has been observed as a norm that these cases are filed to extort money from high earning people in the corporate world especially the software industry which consists of people having an elevated and sharpened intellect and a relatively higher IQ. Also such cases are filed within 5 years of marriage which means that the MAN is either in his late twenties or early thirties which is a very critical juncture of his career. Embroiling young people for an average of 5 – 7 years in such false cases, where conviction can lead to complete ruin of an illustrious career, can be a dealing and yielding blow to the intellectual property, as the man will spend his time, money and energy towards saving his skin from a stereotypically biased system which has refused to move ahead with times. The investments, read time, money and energy, that the man would have otherwise spent on more useful means is now being forced to be wasted to salvage oneself from an effort to ruin the life of the man in particular and society in general.
These were some of the effects and consequences that a false case can have on the people around and the actual victim, the MAN involved in it. Though they cater in general to men whether fathers or not, we will now proceed to look into the same for fathers in particular.
Men who have fathered their offspring: -
The battle is tougher for these people. For, in addition to fight against the legal system and prove themselves innocent for an offense they did not commit, they also need to muster courage to fight against one more thing, the natural emotion of fatherhood as these unfortunate men are deprived of the time they deserve with their children not only by their vindictive wives but also by the judicial system. Long live the Indian Judicial System, which still believes that only mothers can take better care of children and also force the fathers to stay away from their offspring. The judiciary neither believes in shared and joint parenting nor contesting the case on merits. And the brunt of the fallacy is borne by those fathers who not only carry the false sense of guilt of a crime NOT committed, but also have to kill their fatherhood for feeding a marriage devouring monster called the FALSE DOWRY CASE.
There have been umpteen number of instances wherein the fathers are not only blackmailed in the name of their children but also are forced to compromise for the well-being of the child and in spite of the compromise being undertaken, the men are deprived of their child’s love. And in such cases it is not only the men who suffer, innocent silent sufferer’s cries go unheard who are not only unaware of the system, but also suffer at the hands of a vindictive woman who uses the child as a bargain tool to get her illegal way out legally. And the saddest part of the whole bitter truth is that the whole drama is passed off in the legislative atmosphere as WOMEN LIBERATION and EMPOWERMENT OF THE WEAKER SEX.
Sometimes MEN are just threatened of false cases to be lodged against them in case they make an attempt to meet their children. The Indian Penal Code has provided for visitation rights to Men to meet their children, who are separated from their spouses, but it is a long legal battle for the men before they get visitation rights which is again just for a couple of hours on weekends and that too mostly in the court premises where the MEN are not even allowed to bring anything for their children. If they make an attempt to increase meeting hours of visitation they are again threatened with false cases. All this is a toll on the man already but these women and the system fail to notice and understand that how a child who is deprived of the parental love, that he / she not only deserves but also needs very much for a normal upbringing, develops deep and irrevocable mental scars in his / her early days which are lifelong and play major role in the development of the child’s personality and behavioral pattern.
It is not the only bitter fact that the child and the father are not allowed to meet, the time the child is with the mother, she brainwashes the child against the father. There have been cases where the child does not even recognize their own father and has designated them as UNCLES. The child will grow with a falsely imbibed and viciously superimposed sense of hatred and non – belonging towards his / her father and day the child becomes a father, in case the child is a male, will be non – responsive and indifferent towards his children for he as a child was only shown that a MAN is indifferent towards his children. He was never shown the suffering his FATHER went through in staying separate from his own prodigy for no fault on his part except for the fact that he was a responsible, loving and caring man.
These are just some of the consequences of a false case on the child, the MAN and his friends and relatives. There are many far – reaching consequences of such cases which will affect the social, familial, and the economic health of the Indian society in general and individuals in particular. All those who are right now patronizing this misuse and allowing it to spread in order to realize their ulterior motives of power hunger and political urge need to understand that they are slowly digging their own grave and there shall befall a day in their lives when there won’t be a single soul to cremate their rotten bodies. All those who are undergoing the misuse being its victims and are standing up to fight it shall turn out to be better human beings, who could turn an obstacle in their lives into an opportunity.
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India: Safe Haven for International Child Abduction
By Crusader | March 27, 2008
For several reasons, India has become a safe haven for child abductors.
First, India is not a party to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction. The Convention is the fundamental international treaty that protects the rights of abducted children and serves to have them returned promptly to the country of their habitual residence.
Second, the court system in India is extremely slow so that an abductor has ample time to create “facts on the ground” in terms of getting the child sufficiently settled into life in India as to justify an Indian court in ultimately deeming that it is best to keep the child in India.
Third, the law in India was previously settled that foreign children taken by a parent to India without the consent of the other parent would normally be returned to their country of residence or nationality. However recent decisions of courts in India have changed that rule and have held that foreign custody orders are merely items to consider as part of an overall custody review. Thus in a decision dated March 3, 2006 the Bombay High Court at Goa refused to issue a writ of habeas corpus on behalf of a British mother from Ireland whose eight-year-old daughter had allegedly been abducted to Goa by the child’s American father. The High Court dismissed the mother’s application on the ground that normal custody hearings should be undertaken and completed in Goa.
Fourth, no Indian legislation sets forth helpful law on this issue.
As a consequence, courts outside India should be extremely wary about allowing parents to take children for temporary visits to India over the objections of the other parents since there is a great likelihood that parents who wrongfully retain children in India will get away with their wrongful conduct scot-free in India.
PLEASE SIGN EQUAL CUSTODY RIGHTS PETITION HERE
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IPC 498A Explained
By Crusader | March 26, 2008
IPC 498A – The most draconian law ever framed and a provision of the Indian Penal Code highly misused till date has been conferred the honor of breaking Indian families all over the world. From a definition and layman point of view, it seems a very productive and needed law. It has defined HARASSMENT of the MARRIED WOMAN or any of her relatives, herein referred to as harassment, to meet any UNLAWFUL DEMAND by the husband and / or his relatives as a cognizable offence and if proved guilty under trial can lead to imprisonment up to 3 years and / or fine. But all is not said and done with this law. There are gory loopholes in its definition, interpretation and implementation which can have far-reaching consequences legally, ethically, morally, emotionally, socially which are detrimental to the very existence of this society, whose welfare was upheld as the basis in the framing of such a draconian provision. Sounds, strange, ironical, but is surprisingly true as well. Let us have a look at how the law qualifies itself to be placed under the contentious category of DRACONIAN LAWS. We shall start with its definition and loopholes in this article and end with its consequences in the sequel to this one. Remain hooked to this space.
IPC 498A describes the harassment as a
- Non - Bailable
- Cognizable
- Non Compoundable
offence. Now let us have a look into the details of the above terms. The problems with the above aspects of IPC 498A shall be dealt with shortly.
- Non – Bailable: As soon as the case is made prima – facie, the accused shall be arrested and kept in judicial custody and bail will be given only by a 1st class metropolitan magistrate, which shall be at the discretion of the magistrate, who shall have the powers to look into the case and decide thereupon.
- Cognizable: The accused shall be presumed GUILTY until PROVEN INNOCENT. It also puts the burden of proof to innocence on the accused, i.e., if someone has been accused of the UNLAWFUL DEMAND, as described above shall need to prove that such a demand HAS NOT BEEN MADE for acquittal. It also gives the power of arrest to the police without any arrest warrant, who can arrest the accused, if necessary, after proper investigation.
- Non Compoundable: The complaint, of such a nature, leading to an offence under IPC 498A once made cannot be taken back by the complainant.
Having described the marketable features of this law, we will now proceed to study the loopholes contained therein. But before that let us see, how one can make a case under this law. All it needs is a written / verbal complaint from the MARRIED WOMAN or any of her relatives or any other person on her behalf or any Govt. recognized NGO to the local police against the in – laws of the MARRIED WOMAN. The FIR will be registered by the police after necessary investigation by the police and once the FIR is registered the accused will be required to be arrested and produced before the jurisdictional magistrate within 24 hours.
No where does the law define any provision for verifying the tenacity and genuinity of the complaint made or its nature, nor does it say anything about the penalty of filing a false case under this section and getting innocents arrested and unleashing a mayhem of mental torture on them. These two aspects compounded with the above definitive aspects of this law are the prime deciding factors which have been contributing to its wide and rampant misuse by unscrupulous people looking for an opportunity to make a cut by falsely implicating innocents and bargaining with them for money or other demands.
As it is very easy to file a case under this section, and very hard for the accused to get a bail or avoid the case being filed against them without acceding to the demands of the complainant and all the more hard to get the accused convicted given the loose interpretive definition of a plethora of terms in its definition, the most feasible route to use this law to ones criminalist advantages is to file a false complaint against husband and in – laws and get them arrested and fake a physical injury to deny bail to the accused in order to break them down morally and spiritually so that the fear of a trial in spite of being innocent, subsequent potential conviction and the killing fear of social ostracism drives them to a compromise and then the case is quashed, or settled out of the court. This seemingly lucrative possibility of the out of the court settlement, ending in a monetary transaction from the righteous to the not so righteous, is the most attractive bonanza acting as the lifeblood of the virus called FALSE DOWRY CASE which gives unscrupulous and anti – family elements to get their way ahead legally and be termed as a COMPLAINANT and HARASSED and COMPENSATED after the monetary settlement is executed.
We will now examine the loopholes in this law which has led to such a wide magnitude of misuse of this law spanning geographies, Diaspora and time zones as has been corroborated by statistics and figures by the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) which show that 98 % of the cases are false and yet every four minutes a husband is arrested, every day an innocent child is arrested and every three hours a senior citizen is thrust unto jail under this section.
- Case gets registered on a mere complaint. Nowadays it is not very uncommon that girls are forced to marry by their parents to well settled, nicely educated, high profile, wonderfully placed, money minting ATM machines, and these parents of the girls also spend lavishly in the marriage viewing it from a ROI (Returns on Investments) point of view. No sooner after the marriage the girl realizes that she is no longer happy in the marriage because the DREAMS she was shown prior to the marriage by her parents (often to convince her for the marriage) are mere DREAMS never meant to be realized, she starts complaining and the girls’ parents too think it as an opportunity knocking and start planning a case against the guy and his family. This sets the background for the case which gets registered sooner or later on a mere complaint. Since the innocent guy is busy shredding his perspiration giving his best shot at keeping his ATM machine full, he is caught totally unaware when the disaster strikes, let alone his parents who might not have dreamed such an ordeal even in the wildest of their nightmares, and in majority of the cases, the metamorphosis of a happily married man to a legal fighter dies prematurely and the matter ends with a monetary compromise.
- As a monetary settlement is a very easy way out, even the executors of the legislative and the executive machinery in the law and order scenario, eyeing an opportunity in the available CUT, this misuse is patronized by them leading to its legalization under the false paradoxical sugar coated veil of WOMAN EMPOWERMENT and LIBERATION OF WOMEN. Also the Apex Court has now named this ongoing misuse as LEGAL TERRORISM.
- Long live the Indian Legal System (still living in the dark ages), cases remain pending for years and are not settled, so the outcome of the trial happens like one in a million, hence conviction being next to impossible, the girls’ side in tandem with the legislative and executive machinery squeeze out the juice from the Man’s purse and have a field day.
- The reason for initiating such a case as explained in the first point is just one of the many reasons leading to filing of such cases. There can be umpteen number of such reasons like, adultery, extra – marital affair, unwanted pregnancy, incestuous relationship of the girl with some of her family member, unexplained desire for no interference and financial control, extreme greed, leveling of petty marital discords under the devilish influence of false ego, pre-marital undisclosed mental disorders like Bipolar Disease, Borderline Personality Disorder, Delusional Disorder, Extreme mood swings to name a few. Under such scenarios it becomes very handy for the girls and their families to file a FALSE DOWRY CASE and get out of the marriage having made an obnoxious and inauspicious fortune.
- But whatever be the reason, the undue sentimental balance of the legislative and executive machinery towards a particular class of women, the ease with which the case can be filed, the ease with which, on the basis of mere complaint of a lady, whose character and integrity remains to be questioned, one whole family ranging from small innocent children to pregnant sisters to aged, dependent and ailing parents are held at ransom and made to undergo unprecedented and uncalled for fury, wrath, torture, harassment, humiliation, character assassination, and many more atrocities, is also one of the major contributing factors to the spread of this family breaking disease called FALSE DOWRY CASE.
- When we are small, we are taught many things by our parents, and other elders in the family. And sometimes it becomes necessary that we are punished as well to ensure that certain forbidden actions are never repeated nor a habit is made out of them. But as they say, TRUTH is STRANGER than FICTION, there is no, absolutely no punishment for filing a FALSE DOWRY CASE committing a crime of such a heinous nature. Rather, on the contrary, our honorable ministers are passing away the misuse falsely as a minor percentage and citing, “Mistake of facts” as the reason for the MINOR MISUSE they say is happening around. Will be covering more on the “Mistake of facts” syndrome in the sequel. This absence of punishment for alleging abuse falsely is the next major factor breast – feeding the monster called FALSE DOWRY CASE. The girls’ side very well knows that they have nothing to loose absolutely and hence they are all the more salivated to taste this piece of cake like a Labrador eyeing a bone.
- On a brief note, the next reason lubricating the machinery of this racket of legal terrorism and legal extortion is the violation of the basic Human Rights Principle advocated by Amnesty International regarding the presumption of guilt on part of the accused. It says, the accused are to presumed INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY, while this law presumes GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT.
Virag
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